Dating Profile Translations

Thin – Could be anything from sickly anorexic to average.

Athletic – Could mean the girl is a female bodybuilder, or it could mean she used a Stairmaster for all of ten minutes last month. Who knows.

Average – A few extra pounds

A few extra pounds – At least 50 extra pounds

Large – Too big to fit in a Honda Civic. Only date if you own a full-sized car.

Rubenesque – Imagine a chick in a Peter Paul Rubens painting, and then imagine what she’d look like if she gained at least fifty pounds.